2015 here I come….

So… 2014 is over?!!! Quick as a breeze…  the year passed so quickly that I don’t even know if I have accomplished and lived the 365 days of the year….!!

Some of my goals of 2014 were reached, the rest to be carried forward to 2015!!

This has been happening almost every year since I started with the practice… so no issues J

Let’s give this woman a little nod to this and not take a toll on it anymore… already a lot has happened over the year…

Took a lot of family trips to various cities/ states including Kerala, Ooty, Madurai and of course my fav Chennai!!

The trips were very tiring that I really needed a break from tripping!!

I did get that break too….

Apart from these, another great happening that 2015 awaits for is… Am gonna be a mom!!!!

OMG OMG OMG

Now am in my 6^th month of pregnancy and my baby is expected to arrive on April 23^rd, 2015!!

Yaay!!!

2015 welcomes him/her J

I have been so busy through the last 6 months completely into this pregnancy and its care.

Back to back consultations, medicines, scans, tests etc etc etc…

Been a ride…. And still on!

Haven’t been even blogging long since this. Yet am glad I can share this space to introduce 2015 as a year where my role changes and everything I can’t think of now!

My work life has now taken a step back, though am still working; I just stick to my timelines and no attempt to fight the cat race. Just do my job!!

Lot of planning on the baby and my health keeps me busy.

This year though has the start of 2 new members to our family (mine and my sister’s), we lost our grandmother in Oct. I still cannot believe she is not around… That I have moved to a different city after marriage, I still feel she is home… safe and taking rest.

When I go there back, am definitely gonna miss her. She has been everything to me since I know and she has raised me with all pampering that a small down in my life, I feel it’s because of her absence.

2014 to summarize has been a year of experience in every walk of life.

I have learnt a lot professionally and personally. Still learning to handle few situations where I feel I am not matured enough yet. They are all experiences. And am definitely growing….

2015 here I come for a bigger and brighter future…. Save the calendar for my baby and his/her happiness!

Happy New Year!!!

A Year ...

A year? OMG…. I just cannot believe it myself….

It’s been a year since I got married and yay it is my Anniversary day today!!!

First Wedding Anniversary!!!

I feel like I have achieved something big in life. Probably the last 2/3 months I have been waiting for this day. This milestone to be achieved…

I don’t know how exhausted am going to get by the time we reach 25 years of marriage!!

But the feeling that you have cleared a milestone and a genuine one in my case, feels awesome!!

Am saying genuine because, I have no big complains in my marriage. 

As posted in my previous blog, Marriage – An encounter, it is so true…. Which I still stand by with the proud moment of having experienced it for a year now!!

Yes, I continued the momentum of marriage as an encounter and luckily for me, my husband Sriram also gave way for it. Without him it would have been impossible for me to say these….

A year of positives… the first year of marriage is definitely bliss. It’s the initial months you are completely thrown to a stranger (in my case) where every dimension of the person whom you’re sharing the roof with is completely new. This holds good for both.

I have believed before marriage that, the first year is always loving as we try to be the nicest possible and with no revealing of the split personality within us. One year is somehow still very long a period to stay not so you. At least 50% of your split would have been revealed by now, is my opinion.

Yes, and if your spouse can put up with your 50% and you can put up with his/her 50% then definitely there need not be any hesitation to take the first year of marriage a celebration!!

I know am creating a big drama as if am an expert when compared to couples who have celebrated 10, 15, 25 years of marriage!!

I can sense that… but mine is an achievement too in my books and I would like to cherish this.

And hey… my mom has got me an anniversary gift and I cannot wait to see what surprises Sriram has for me…. So definitely an important reason to celebrate!!

Alright…. My anniversary day has begun now and I cannot wait to see how my day goes!!

Happy Wedding Anniversary Krupa and Sriram!!

A step ahead…

Every day is learning, we say. Until schooling this made sense, later I wondered what’s there to learn. Am too young to talk on life etc…

So what??!!  everyone speaks, so let me also!!! ;)

I know my nieces share life questioning thoughts on Facebook, am definitely a little more experienced and want to share my piece…

Yes, the learning curve does not start and end with Math, Science and arts… its more!!

Life means? I really don’t know…

Life teaches you something? I really don’t know…

Life is just living? I really don’t know…

But what I know is, life is me… and my life is mine.

It encloses everything – breathing, family, friends, siblings, love, relationships, society, country, world, happiness, joy, sadness, hatred, fun, work, money and so on….

It’s endless and there are more you want to add… that you started popping up…

Hey u missed marriage, travel, music…

Yes yes, each of us has our definition!!

I’m working in IT sector, married and in a different city to where I grew up.

Am least comfortable and completely new to all!!!

I make tons of mistakes every day. Am not sure how to handle them but it’s the mistakes that make me learn what not to do.

Maybe this is life, where every day you are taught, to compete with self and to be a better person than what you were yesterday.

And I know, am a step ahead than yesterday in learning to handle people, my work, my interests and everything that I feel is part of life ….

And yes, am still not 60 to talk about life and experience, but every day makes me feel bolder and not just older J

Girl with pony

She was crossing by in a scooter with her dad. Two cute ponies that were pointed up and open like a flower, shaking her head left to right, dancing to her own tunes.

She was singing happily standing on the scooter while her dad was driving.

He was a serious man. She was the opposite!!

She had no idea how the man driving her was looking or feeling J

On her way to play school, maybe, she caught my attention…

We all talk about kids and their behavior. How they always keep smiling or keep themselves busy in their own world. We should learn from them.

This girl, a fraction of 30 seconds, made me feel good as I was travelling to work.

She was happy, singing, shaking to her songs.

On the other hand, I was feeling frustrated for reasons that were not under my control?

On seeing her, she immediately brought a smile in me. A kind of relief I had within me.

I felt calm and peace. And I smiled all the way to office thinking about this little girl.

True happiness lies within you… 

Selfie season!!

Yes… it’s the selfie season now, where we see so many people posting their pics on social sites titled “Selfie”. It’s a new craze and we social beings are so obsessed with self that we forget the reason behind the pictures being taken.

Social networking has come a long way. Technology has come a long way from where this social life has come into existence. I understand it’s great to have “such” forums where people can interact and keep in touch with their friends who are separated by distance.

But to my amusement, even people living in the same house, use this medium to talk!!

Sad plight of people’s priorities…

The attention seeking mechanism of these selfies, comments, sharing ideologies etc are leading to?!!

I remember 10 years back when internet was booming, people used it for e-mail, googling, education etc. Now, it’s more for a social interaction with ease of using.

I’m happy we are changing to the changes happening, getting used to the new technical advances.

Not fearing the changes of innovations.

But aren’t we missing on the minute realistic moments which are the greatest memory to cherish?

Taking pictures of self and sharing with your loved ones is great!

Taking pictures of self and family and treasuring them for life is happiness…

Taking pictures of self and feeling good about self is motivation….

But taking pictures of self and posting it on social network just to get attention and feeling dejected and demotivated if not liked is stupid …

Friends, lets realize that world is not the internet and people there are virtual only!!

Get to the real life and live with contempt!

Attention!! Attention!!!

We all need attention… from our parents, friends, family, at work and society. This has become a minimal expectation.

I read an article recently which talked about the “attention” one needs and receives on FaceBook!

Yes… it’s the place where all young/old are seeking attention.

The article read that people are getting dejected and demotivated if their posts or pics are not liked or shared by their followers.

OMG!! Yes… we all need attention…

We are looking for it in the virtual world instead of real?!!

In real also, attention is a must and every individual needs it.

Be it rich or poor, boy or girl, young or old.

Kids get attention always… they are cheerful and happy. So do elders need... I am sure you must have faced a time when you wanted attention, from someone?

Mothers always give attention to her children at all ages….

Attention – to be given and got! Give attention to your kith and keen. And you will get back in bounds.

The social attention through facebook is just a way to feel good on social life but it noway should influence us or our confidence.

Remember friends,

NO ONE CAN MAKE YOU FEEL INFERIOR WITHOUT YOUR CONSENT!

Miss Bride

My friend got engaged yesterday and shared some of her pics. She looked beautiful. The make-up, pattu saree, the ornaments. Wow… All looked great!!

The most important of all is the attention!!!

Yes… the attention we get on our wedding day is amazing…

I really wish I was bride again! J

I want to get dressed up in nice sarees and jewelry with different hair styles make-up, friends gathered around, making fun of you… teasing you for the changes gonna happen. Your relatives around waiting to see you get on stage.

This is one place where all the attention and eyes are on YOU!

My wedding happened 4 months back and I still remember how much fun it was. The wedding planner, shopping, relatives, friends and the hall, decorations!! Everything was overwhelming.

The food – yes, we attend weddings to eat good food, but when it was my wedding, with all the happening around, and the excitement … food became secondary.

There were lots of things happening.

I really got to say this to all the to-be-brides, sooner or later, do take care and spend time for your accessories and make-up, you will love it!

Enjoy the whole process.

It’s fun!!

Don’t over spend though but don’t limit yourself, for it doesn’t happen every day.

The pictures are the memories, so you should look great!!

I’ve always felt, who ever getting married, she/he looks amazing that day.

They have the charm in them and the glow.

And yeaaaa I still wanna be married again… not for a new husband but the whole function is like a festival!!

I miss being a bride… 

Disturbed

What’s the problem??!! Why is this happening always??!!

Is there no end to this crap on women?

No punishment is gonna stop these violent “men”?

On hearing the news about two of my colleagues, I don’t even know them, but just hearing this and knowing and relating them to the work place I had worked few months back only makes me sooo disturbed.

Siru seri in Chennai is no doubt a forest away from the city. It’s scary in the evenings to go out alone.

Whom to be blamed?!!

Ruthless behavior….

There are n number of such incidents, why some caused nation breakthrough… what’s the use?

Who has changed coz of it? It’s gotten worse…. I guess!

The fear of being punished if found culprit, has made them do a bigger mistake by not leaving any hint of the incident and now not even trace of the victim….

Not that I wanna refer her victim…. But we are all victims to this!!

Not able to change the society but sit at one corner typing all this to get the anger out of me….

We are victims to this unfair society!!

Starting from home to public places, women are always considered lesser… lesser in what? Everything?

Dunno why!!

Women have to be safe… that’s the end point stated …

Alright… there are tons of articles, newsletters, blogs where people talk and debate about this.

Even then there is no end… and this is my part of anguish…

The pain and agony she must have gone through is incomparable to what we write or how much we talk about it.

An unfair society…

Marriage - an encounter... contd...

Yeah… back to my encounter on marriage…

The changes after marriage are huge, starting from change of place to living…

Am still in my initial months of marriage, that’s how I tell myself to still feel like a new bride…

It is a great feeling. The days after marriage are a little embarrassing initially with you know what J

As time passes, I got used to it and so I guess the people around too.

Am a feminist and I respect every woman for the changes she goes through, how she accustoms to it.

My mother, mother in law, grandmother, aunt, sisters, friends….

After marriage, the respect has multiplied by bounds! I can relate how they would have handled it and managed.

My friend and I were discussing the same, she is married too. She was telling how much time she took to adjust and accustom to the changes.

25 plus years living comfortably in one place, under a roof where every room and wall is your friend. Moving to a totally different place within city or outside, that place is always alien and never feel or refer it as home!

But women do finally take that as their home... That’s the power of women!

For men, it is easy… coz it’s always been their home.  But still I appreciate men for managing between mother and wife attempting to make the wife comfortable in her new home.

Relatives – it is another big challenge… and relatives of relatives is further complicated.

Now you have thrice the relatives as compared to before marriage. It was ok not to enquire or talk on phone or not visiting relatives and their relatives, but after marriage… you are bound to do all that.

May be not all compel in this generation, but I guess still in some families it’s expected.

Thankfully not the case in mine J I am glad!!

But definitely, relatives make a change and their talks and comments…

I suggest “ignore”. That’s the best way to get them out of our line.

“Ignorance is bliss”, truly applicable and best after marriage.

Next comes responsibilities. Before marriage all girls, atleast most of us, don’t have much responsibilities. We have our parents to take care of every little thing.

But once married, even if you have in-laws and other important relatives, you should be responsible. From the house’s cleanliness to assets… That’s a big change which I guess people expect in a day!

Give the woman a little time, it’s there in every woman and she will definitely come out successful.

This pressure is not only in the in-laws side, even in our mother’s. My family will get a good name only if I adhere and follow the above. That’s their thought.

Gimme a break, lot of woman do all this, still they don’t have that good impression. Why struggle.

I suggest, take your time…. First get to know your new family, coz they are important. Your husband. Spend more time with him and make the best use of the first year to impress him the best coz that relation is the foundation for the rest.

COOOKINGGGGG… can I stress more on that? No way!

I am definitely not a good cook and I don’t cook only. My mother in law does and she does it amazingly well that I can never make it like her. So why give competition? ;)

The same pressure from mother’s side as in the above case continues here and sometimes more stressed!

My friend says, a family and impressing them starts from kitchen. So true…..

No doubt you can reach all of their hearts through good tasty loving food. So again take your time for this. Coz first impression is best impression. So learn good cooking, am sure it’s not hard. Just need the right time to do it. Use it.

Don’t compete for the kitchen. If you are in a joint family, give the mother the space she owned in her kitchen all the years. Don’t try to take over. She’ll get offended.  Grow with her in the kitchen and make it as OUR kitchen!!

Attending weddings and other relative’s functions – pressure to look good and impressive. Talk a lot. Smile always…

We attended a marriage recently in another city along with my in-laws.

I was following the “rules” to attend a function as above and yeah… my smile… guess I over did that ;)

One of my relatives commented that … “Oh… come here, where is she the one who smiles a lot”

It was embarrassing, not knowing how to be. I was confused. So should I smile or not???

Again I follow – IGNORE!!

So friends, marriage isn't that hard, just take it as the next event in your life… like education/work so on…

Don’t dread it (I used to earlier). It’s the next occurrence in life… An encounter

I am still in the start, but sharing and learning every bit of it makes it more interesting.

Marriage as an encounter

Marriage – seems to be something that takes you off board literally, as a girl moves away from her home to a new home.

In matter of no time, this happens and I too went through this transition 2 months back!
No doubt I had bounds of fear that cannot be expressed. And I learnt that every girl who becomes a woman after marriage goes through the same.

Fear of being accepted,
Fear of being a “good” daughter-in-law,
Fear of being a “good” wife,
Fear of being a “good” sister-in-law,
Fear of being a “good” co-sister,
Fear of being a “good” aunt for tomorrow,
Fear of change,
Fear of living together,
Fear of household chores,
Fear of work-personal life balance,
Fear of financial troubles,
Fear of differences,
Fear of pleasing relatives,
And so on…..

I've ordered the relationship fears exactly the way it’s prioritized for always in our Indian society, being a “good” daughter-in-law fulfills half the “good” wife requirement. J

Accepting the new people as family is toughest for me. I have had situations where I couldn’t easily take in them as “my” family.  I still refer my mom, dad, grandma and the others with whom I grew up as “my family”.

We all learn from our mistakes and so from others… but every woman/individual has to experience this and learn something new by herself/themselves.

Here are some moments which I would like to recapture on the changes I’ve gone through and enjoyed too…
The day I got engaged, that was the first time I got to meet all my in-laws relatives. I was scared to be accepted by all, because the entire audience of relatives hadn’t seen me before.
But I was shocked and overwhelmed to find that they accepted and welcomed me with full hands!!
The love transmitted in smiles and welcomes… I felt accepted for the first time.
It was almost 2 weeks of pressure I had on this, before engagement.

Courtship – a beautiful time where two people entering into bond of marriage, try to impress each other the best they can to give an assurance to the other that this person is my “perfect” life partner.
I had a period of 4 months and I must tell you, I enjoyed it even more for it wasn’t the way I stated before. I experienced to see a person who was casual and not trying to impress the girl he was going to marry. A practical one!!
I dint have any head over heel moments but definitely could see myself entering into a future of matured relationship.

The reassurance I got through this was high, it could be because of my age too where I wasn’t in for any such flirt talks but I never regretted for not having one either.

As wedding was nearing, the demands in the relationship changed. The fears increased as we were just being two people getting to know each other with no expectation!
I was stunned at myself for this….

Am sure the groom also has his part of fears and they are known easily in the conversations J
The wedding planner begins… the attires, dress rehearsals, honeymoon, mehendi etc…
These are indeed the best part of pre-marriage!!

And I thoroughly enjoyed every bit of this and that. The tension, stress, endless shopping, packing etc.
This is one time and we must cherish and live the moment by enjoying it.

Started counting the days that I was going to be home. Excited and scared!
The wedding day arrived…. OMG… quick…
Wedding is over!!!!!!!!!!!
And am married now….

This is how quick the marriage happens after the months of fear and excitement!!
Sometimes I wondered, did I do all the spending for this one day???
But when I see the pictures and videos, definitely worth it!!!

Happiness of your family and friends, boundless!
Smiles and tears rolling off your loved ones cannot be captured in words.
I really got to see lot of loving moments during my marriage and I will cherish those throughout my life!

And yea, I just got married…. But the encounter of marriage is to be continued….